Getaway

(Those are my toes.)

I recently got gone.  Rather, I got away.  Or, I went on a getaway.  Whatever way you choose to say it, I left home to spend a few days in Mexico.   And, not spring break, Señor Frogs, Montezuma's revenge Mexico...serene, adults-only Mexico, with only a few drunken idiots mixed in...just the way I like it.

This was my first time going away in a long time.  In fact, I haven't traveled internationally since 2004, so I had to renew my expired passport in order to go.  Luckily, I had never updated it to reflect my married name, so that was one less government agency with whom I had to share my divorce decree. Sweet.

It took some finagling and planning, but the boyfriend and I found childcare, took off from work, etc. so that we could have four WHOLE days for our trip.  In parent time, that's like two weeks. Of course, EJ got sick the day before I left, which resulted in a stressful, harried pediatrician trip in which I had the poor doctor pinky-swear me that it was okay to leave my coughing child.   But, I won't even get into that.  Or, I will not tell you how I forgot my entire makeup bag on EJ's Playskool table, and only realized it after we'd gotten through security at JFK.  Now, before you blow off the significance of that, I must remind you that I need to draw on my eyebrows in order to look like a functioning member of society. My makeup bag did not contain frivolous items like a smoky eye kit, it contained essentials like my eyebrow tools, a comb, hair rubber bands, etc.  Do you want to go on vacation with no brows or extra hair ties?  I think not, my friends, I think not.  So, I shed exactly three tears, put this ridiculous problem into perspective, and took fifteen minutes to buy a comb, mascara, and an eyebrow pencil.  Then, I told my boyfriend to get a good look at my face with curled eyelashes and eyeliner and pronounced that I would be sporting a camping-like appearance for the next few days.  Luckily, he doesn't care about that kind of stuff (and the one hair tie I did have on me lasted the whole time).

Okay, onto the actual trip.  It was lovely.  Being able to do NOTHING for an extended period of time was wonderful.  My days were read, relax, swim, drink, repeat.  And, since my parent self is incapable of sleeping in, I was able to put in full days of doing nothing from 6:30 a.m. until bedtime.  In fact, we pretty much opened up the pool each morning, along with the nice men who were vacuuming it and folding beach towels.  And, by the end of each night, we were truly wiped.  Nothing can be tiring.

Alright, now the point of this post.  Ummm, I guess nothing.  Just like the point of a getaway.  There are no goals, no must-dos, no checklists, no divine awakenings or revelations (usually).   It's just a break.  A reprieve.  A recharge.  A time to vacate your life and up your calorie intake, just for a bit.  And maybe that in itself is a revelation.  Because if you like getting back home into your routine after a getaway, you're not doing so bad for yourself.  And, when your routine gets to be too much, you plan another getaway.  Then repeat.

Re

In life, we face a lot of  RE opportunities.  You regrow your hair after a bad cut, you refinance your house or car, you reteach your children how to ride a bike or tie their shoes, you retake bad photos or tests, and you refurnish or refurbish rooms in your home.  Sometimes your RE's are bigger and you have to rebuild something that has been decimated or taken away from you.

A RE can be just as scary and tiresome as it is exciting and invigorating.  It's part glass half empty/half full mentality, or depends on what exactly it is that needs to be done again.  I would certainly prefer reconfirming my hotel reservation in Tuscany to renewing my license at the DMV.

Two and a half years ago, the version of life I was living abruptly came to an end, and I had to start my adult life over again.  At first I was heartbroken, but then I pumped inspirational girl rock and recited various mantras and suddenly felt elated to have the opportunity to restart my life.  Yay.  One problem though, I've just realized haven't really restarted much of anything.  Bummer.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm proud of myself for standing up amidst the rubble of my married life to move forward as a pregnant lady with no plan and seemingly nowhere to go.  I found a place to live, birthed my son, etc. etc., and have even learned to relove and trust in another person.  I've managed to remain dedicated to my profession, and I've held onto most of the friends from my former life.  I also didn't start talking to cats or develop a meth problem, so I'm certainly not a slouch who has regressed.  However, none of the things that I've accomplished since EJ was born are true restarts. I've just kinda been coasting along, and though that's been absolutely fine, it's starting to feel redundant.

To be perfectly honest, I'm the type of mom who is a little self-centered, and I do better by EJ when I feel good about me.  This doesn't mean I can only parent after a mud body wrap and tennis lesson...I'm talking about a manicure here and there and seven hours of sleep.  Anyways, I think now is the time for me to truly reestablish myself.  And, not as the married lady I was in my late 20s, but the person before that.  The person who had a few ballsy hopes and goals.  The person who was less excited about cutting coupons for organic fruit pouches and more excited to travel anywhere and learn new things.  It's that person I'd like to refamiliarize myself with.  I think she'd be a cooler person and a kick-ass mom.  Since I'm a list-maker, I've made a list of things I'd like to do to truly restart my life.  And, if my effort starts to drop off as the days get shorter and the weather gets colder,  I'll reread my list and renew my dedication. 

At the end of this proposed recharge, I'll still be a coupon-cutting, suburban mom.  But, I'll be reinvigorated in other aspects of my life, which is ultimately the goal.  If you could RE something in your life, what would be it be?